90s Church Lady Dress

You know the dress I am talking about--sometimes it is two pieces, sometimes one, always made of cotton/rayon and never without a strange animal/flower/doily detail. I believe it to be the traditional dress of school teachers or mothers with four or more children. Rarely spotted since Koala Blue closed its doors, this garment makes occasional appearances on laundry day and when Oprah interviews women in extremist religious cult camps. But today, I saw it, just around the bend from the copy machine.

Unfortunately, taking pictures at my internship would be completely inappropriate, so it must suffice to find a similar photo online.

I know these dresses were popular in the late eighties/early nineties ala. Elaine from Seinfeld and the Designing Women; heck, I even think there is a Christmas photo of my sisters and I wearing similar dresses from 1990. In our defense we were all under the age of 12 and styled by a mother with gigantic purple plastic framed glasses( I love you mom!). What defense does a 40-50 year old woman in 2009 have? Like the tapered pant suit, I ask "Why?" There are so many reasons this clothing is wrong and not a single reason why it is right.

Please, if you spot this dress, burn on contact!